See, much like the popped-collar Broseph who’s convinced that doing “Straight Out of Compton” at the Applebees karaoke night is a good idea after five Tuaca bombs, when you’re in the throes of your first relationship, your common sense tends to go right out the window. Those early glory days fade faster than you realize.That rush means in the oxytocin haze, but falls apart when it fades and her inability to clean up after herself isn’t cute anymore. Just don’t let that early infatuation push you into going too far, too fast. In fact, let’s talk about that for a minute: One thing that almost always freaks out relationship newbies: the first fight.My first serious relationship was full of avoidable mistakes and disasters that one might charitably call “learning experiences” because I had no fucking clue what I was doing.But as much fun as it is to get lost in the rush of that initial infatuation, you have to be careful.The question is whether you fight If you’re going to fight, you want to aim to resolve the source of conflict, not aim to wound the other person.More importantly though: don’t let the anger linger.The only difference is that people who’ve had other relationships have the experience to guide them through the rough patches.That first relationship can be tricky because you’re basically groping in the dark.
Nerd Love, both here and at Kotaku start off the same way: “I’ve never had a girlfriend”.
Many my readers have a lot of anxiety over finding their first relationship.
In fact, many feel that they’re essentially relationships are functionally like a first relationship.
Every relationship is a matter of getting to know the other person, making your lifestyles and expectations mesh, learning how to tolerate each other’s little quirks etc.
(And don’t get me started on the people who get engaged within three to six months of dating…) Don’t get me wrong: I’m not saying the rush is bad. Up until this point, everything has been smooth sailing where the harshest disagreement you’ve had is “who is more schmoopy”.
And then one of you says something wrong over take out Pad-Thai and suddenly there’s yelling and there’s crying and with which you fight also isn’t automatically an indication of a problem at the core of your relationship; some couples tend to be incredibly passionate and fights may result from those passions colliding.