It’s a reality that’s rarely discussed and even more rarely reported…perhaps because LGBT people fear that if they ask for help, they might have to deal with homophobic or transphobic reactions from police or other officials, or even people they know or work with.
If you already understand how much you’re hurting your partner and your family – if you feel guilty and apologetic after an abusive incident, and promise yourself and your partner that you’ll change, but the abuse doesn’t stop – you’re not the only one. If you’re struggling with abuse, you know that leaving your partner isn’t easy for a lot of reasons, even though you may know you’re not in a healthy relationship.
The Wheel – designed by the Domestic Abuse Intervention Project in Duluth, Minnesota – uses “male perpetrator language” because most reports of abuse have been, historically, male against female.
We believe no one deserves to be hurt or abused, and that’s why our advocacy services are “equal-opportunity.” If anything in the Power & Control Wheel describes your relationship – or if you’re worried or confused – call to talk to us. Abusers use fear, guilt, shame, and intimidation to keep someone else — usually an intimate partner – under their control.
‘Walk out the back, Jack’ is a cute song lyric, but real life just isn’t that simple.
Relationships involve a complex intertwining of emotions, memories, and patterns of behavior that can take a long time to unravel, especially when the relationship is dangerous. You see, nearly two million Americans age 65 and older have been injured, exploited, or mistreated by someone they love or depend on for care and protection.
Domestic abuse is a deliberate and ongoing pattern of behavior used by one person to control the actions and feelings of an intimate partner or family member.The Power & Control Wheel shown below illustrates the different ways abuse can affect a relationship.