When someone says “Talk dirty to me baby…” in the bedroom the hopefully-soon-to-be dirty talker instantly freezes like a soaking wet roll of toilet paper being thrown out of an igloo in Antartica. (For the record, I don’t believe in the words “dirty talk” since there’s nothing dirty about sex or talking about sex. Dirty talk, just like sex itself, is something that needs to be calibrated to the individual that is hearing the dirty talk from their partner.A good rule of thumb with dirty talk is to tell your partner what you want to do to them/with them before you’re doing it, and then while you’re doing it, tell them what you’re liking about it.For example, maybe your partner has a relatively high sex drive but their engine only gets revved up when they’re already thinking about sex. Again, this will all be based on what you authentically desire in the moment, but saying something along the lines of “I’m trying to get work done but I can’t stop thinking about last week when we were 69’ing and your delicious juices were flowing into my mouth” could be the thing that pushes them over the edge to jumping you.If you are on a personal connection, like at home, you can run an anti-virus scan on your device to make sure it is not infected with malware.
They want to have sex more often but it just doesn’t cross their mind all that often. Any statement about what you have liked doing with them, or that you are envisioning doing with them, is a great way to ease into a super-vocal sex session.
And while you’re fooling around, giving your partner real time feedback about what you’re enjoying is a great way to encourage them to give you more of that thing, and also gives your sexual play the added edge of becoming more of a multi-sensory experience.
For a lot of people, it’s the details of dirty talk that make it so much of a turn on.
For the record, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with statements like “Yeah, I like that,” “You look so hot right now,” and “I love having sex with you.” But they can be supercharged in a massive way if you shift them each with a bit of descriptive detail.
Alas, this is what people call it so I have to meet society where it’s currently at.I prefer to call it erotic talk, but that’s a subject for another day.) I’ll get into specific phrases you can use momentarily, but first, some guidelines to help you get your black belt from the dirty talk dojo.